Gratitude Can Change Your Life
- Tom Faletti
- 3 days ago
- 4 min read
Updated: 6 hours ago
Developing a habit of gratitude can rewire your brain and change your life and the lives of others. Here are some ideas for how to give thanks.
How might a habit of gratitude change you, your family, your workplace, and your life?
Gratitude rewires your brain
Psychologists tell us that if we can think of 3 things to be thankful for every day, it can rewire our brain. It can be as simple as, “I am grateful for my home,” “I am grateful for the chance to watch that leaf float to the ground,” and “I am grateful for the taste of this food.”
Gratitude has sometimes been described as a “natural antidepressant” because it releases the neurotransmitter dopamine.
One of the interesting things about this research is that it doesn’t require giving thanks to anyone in particular. The mere expression of gratitude affects us.
But there are additional benefits if we express our thanks directly to other people or to God. It can magnify the effect.
Gratitude has two dimensions
When we talk about gratitude, we usually focus on giving thanks to others. When we talk about giving thanks (or Thanksgiving), we often focus on our gratitude toward God.
Both have their place, and both can change your perspective and your life.
The apostle Paul was deft at doing both at the same time. For example, in his first letter to the Thessalonians, he wrote, “We give thanks to God always for all of you” (1 Thess. 1:2, NABRE), and then he proceeded to tell the Thessalonians all the things about them that he was thankful for: their faith, love, and hope and their joy in the Holy Spirit in the midst of persecution. (You can see more about why Paul was so thankful for the Thessalonians here.)
In his letter to Philemon, he thanked God for Philemon’s faith and his love for the “holy ones” or “saints” – his fellow believers (Phile. 4-5). He then wrote, speaking directly to Philemon, “I have experienced much joy and encouragement from your love, because the hearts of the holy ones have been refreshed by you, brother” (Phile. 7, NABRE). (Philemon was the kind of person who makes a positive impact on others. You can learn more about him here.)
Paul knew the power of gratitude in his relationships. Gratitude can change not only our brain, but also our relationships at work, at home, and with our friends.
Express your gratitude to others
There is power in telling others that we appreciate them.
David C. Wilson, the dean of the Goldman School of Public Policy at the University of California, Berkeley, told a story about gratitude in a letter to the GSPP community in 2023:
“I sat on a barren rocky sand berm in Iraq and pondered the unfairness of an unjust war and my role in it. Serving in the US Army, my deployment had reached the point of seven months with no clear end date to return home. The loneliness and uncertainty produced resentment and frustration, making the moment worse. I blamed the Army, politicians, the public, and anything else I could think of for the feelings I held. Just as I was unleashing a fit of expletives, a fellow soldier came up to me, offered me a granola bar and bottle of water, gave me a hug, and said, “Thanks for being here with me.” He gave a smile and then just walked off. That moment of gratitude and offering changed everything for me during a very difficult time.”
Even a simple word of gratitude can make a difference.
Make a habit of expressing your thanks
People who make gratitude a lifestyle can change the world they live in.
Imagine a family, a workplace, a friend group where at least one person is always seeing the positive and expressing gratitude. Wouldn’t that be a good place to be?
You could be that person.
What does it feel like when you give or receive gratitude? Take a look at this video to see gratitude in action (warning: it will put a smile on your face but might also tug at your heart):
When we take the time to express gratitude to someone, we open the a door for them to embrace a new perspective of themselves.
If it is unusual for you to do that, they may wonder what’s gotten into you. But if you keep doing it whenever the opportunity arises, you will eventually become known as that person who approaches all of life with gratitude. All it takes is to keep doing it regularly.
How to express your thanks
Gratitude can be especially powerful when we thank a person for what they have done and then tell them what strength we see in them that was demonstrated by what they did. Here is an example: “Thank you for being there and encouraging me the other day. You’re really good at showing compassion in a way that helps others feel supported.”
To help you figure out what to say, you might ask yourself these questions:
Who am I grateful for?
What have they done that makes me appreciate them?
What does their action show me about their character or their strengths?
When is my next opportunity to tell them?
You can model this in your home, your workplace, among your friends: anywhere you spend time. Doing this regularly can gradually make a significant difference in the lives of the people around you. And it will make you feel good, too – remember that dopamine effect.
Give thanks whenever you can, to whoever you can.
You can also thank God for the good feelings that gratitude engenders in you. It is a blessing that we are wired so that dopamine is released when we express our gratitude. It didn’t have to be that way. But it is, thank God!
(For more on how to give thanks to God, see Giving Thanks to God is an Antidote to Hubris.)
